Anyone can have a one-night stand. Some alcohol and a few questionable decisions…then it’s over before you know it. But is that really what you want?

If you are looking for love, a deeper connection and a relationship with a long-term girlfriend, that will take a bit of finesse. You may be wandering how to find a girlfriend and make the clever and brave decision of meeting the girl of your dreams through online dating.

Contrary to what you may believe, dashing looks and a huge bank account are not the qualities women look for in a man. Statistically, women settle down with men who make them laugh, and men who share their interests.

Now, the good news; you already are that funny and interesting guy! There are girls out there who get your sense of humor and like the same things you like – trust me!

You just need to know how and when to seize every opportunity to find them. So, listen closely.

Tip #10: Stay Away From Pick-up Lines

Any sentence that starts with “Hey baby!” will immediately disqualify you. The more genuine and sincere you seem, the more likely a girl will be to engage in conversation. Make an observation about your surroundings at a park or ask her if she has food recommendations in line at the café. Keep your opening conversations light when chatting up a pretty girl and see where it leads.

Tip #9: Look For Everyday Opportunities To Be Chivalrous

Give up your seat on the bus for a girl that catches your eye or let that cute woman behind you in line go first. She will be so charmed by your unexpected gesture that a conversation will easily open up.

Tip #8: Play Up What Makes You Different

Naturally, men want to hide their flaws. A balding man will wear a hat while a man with crooked teeth will hide his smile. But actually, being imperfect makes you more likely to attract a woman. Studies show that flaws make a man more approachable and more relatable. After all, a woman desires a real man.

Tip #7: Use Your Interests to Your Advantage

Let your true self shine through by getting involved in something you enjoy! Do you love video games? Go to gaming conventions – you’ll find girls aplenty. Do you appreciate baseball? Go mingle in the beer garden at a local game. There will also be girls. You’ve just got to start a conversation with one that shares your passion.

Tip # 6: Travel

If you’re having no luck meeting women in your area, get out of town for the weekend. When you’re traveling, you are already in a spontaneous state of mind, and so are fellow female travelers. Stay at a hostel or go to a music festival – you are bound to meet someone special in this way.

Tip #5: Don’t Be Afraid To Go Alone

A woman is less likely to approach a man in a group than she would be to approach a man hanging out on his own. If there’s one thing that frightens people more than rejection, it’s being rejected in front of a lot of people!

Tip # 4: Ask Your Friends to Set You Up

In the uncertain world of online dating, it is refreshing to be set up on a date with someone who can be vouched for. The odds are good that the person who sets you up adores both you and your date. Your chances for a disappointing encounter have already dropped.

Tip # 3: Pay Attention to Your Body Language

If you remember nothing you’ve read today, just remember this: crossed arms and slouched shoulders say, “Leave me alone!” An open posture and friendly smile, on the other hand, will send the message that you are open for conversation. Positivity will draw the right women to you.

Tip # 2: Don’t Hesitate To Make a Plan

If you choose to pick up girls at a bar, don’t let your goal be to make a move, but to make a plan. Saying, “I want to take you home” is going to get you a girl for eight hours. Saying, “I want to take you to the beach or park tomorrow” is going to ensure something more solid.

Tip # 1: When You Do Get That First Date – Do Something Fun!

A white tablecloth and stuffy restaurant make for an uncomfortable first date. This is your chance to show your fun side and make her laugh! Go to a comedy show or teach her how to fish. If you insist on taking her out to dinner, go somewhere entertaining, like to a teppanyaki joint or a sushi bar. Perhaps even a comedy show that’s not too crude will make you relax and laugh. You’re almost guaranteed a second date.

Remember: women are human! Everyone gets nervous and everyone wants to be desired. So, don’t put so much pressure on the situation. Relationships are a two-way street; you deserve to be as into her and she is into you. Being who you genuinely are is not only how you will attract a girl, it’s how you’ll keep that girl.


Emma Walters
Emma is an arts and science student graduating this year from NYU. She loves New York City and writes about her big city single-hood experiences. “Being single in the Big Apple is more of a task than a status”, she says, “Dating sites are great for socializing, especially if you’re new in town”. Emma is a regular contributor to the Top 5 Dating blog.
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  • Outdoor Girl

    The example of interests and saying do you like to play video games and go to video game conventions is a horrible example. One image comes to mind a slacker who lives in his parents basement does not work eats junk food and is zoned out on video games.

    • Tanner

      That’s quite an outdated stereotype, actually. The world of gaming has many viable career paths in the tech world.